Sweet tears

Sweet tears fall from my eyes...
A simple sentiment to whats broken  
Behind my face, behind my vale
Lays a scared, broken soul.

A poem for Robert.

Robert…how do you make me love you?
Every day I need you
I know you’re there …
When my mind feels numb
Sorrow and pain over flowing
When it feels like I can’t go on
You hold me,
You comfort me.

You’re….
Amazing
You’re the most beautiful thing…
From your eyes to your toes
Your personality,
My love,
How can I tell you?
How much I love you?

Just as surely as the sun will rise tomorrow
So is as sure will I be yours
Just as easily as I say the truth, the words, I love you
Will they prevail over people who will try,
Try to keep us apart for who we are, for who we love
They can say what they want, make our lives as hard as they need too
But I know with you
I’ll stand right through it.

Every day we live we’re closer to the day we die…
If that day was today
There’d only be a single regret, never holding you.
You’ve made my life heaven,
You’ve made it meaningful,
You’ve given me hope for tomorrow…
That tomorrow will come
And we’ll be together.

I love you…
I love you with everything I am
Every part of me loves you…
From the depth of my heart
To the sea’s of my eyes
I love you
I love you…
I love you, Robert.

When I look

When I look to the sky
I know you're there
Holding me
So many days have passed
So many tears.

When I look to the sea
I see the rolling waves,
Like a turbulent life
They shatter one another
And destroy the sand.

When I look to your eyes
I see nothing but joy
I see the future
I do not see pain
I see love
I love you.

Scared.

My life is in ruins. My god, my sister is always there and yelling. And people just gotta yell at me. I'm scared and they don't understand. I'm so scared now. I'm sitting here shaking and just gotta tell someone, even if no one reads this, it'll be good just to vomit my feelings up right now. I gotta tell you, theres so much turbulence in my heart right now, that I feel like a river, at some point there has to be a waterfall. We can only pray that our raft stays afloat. Theres no doubting that the raft will end up going under at one point or another, but as long as it bobs back up, we WILL be safe. I dunno what I'm going to do. There are friends there, holding out a hand (or paw), all wanting to help. But there are so few people I can trust today. Or any day. I can't trust my sister ever again, my family is there, lovingly tripping me trying to destroy all I hold dear, and yet all I can think of is what a friend told me some time ago...

James, It'll get better. Trust in yourself and your god.

Isn't that what we all should do? So much has happened, and so many have died. I dunno. I'll live, i know that much.